![]() It's one thing to encourage each other to grow and improve, but that doesn't mean you should expect your partner to have a complete personality overhaul, or magically move past a giant obstacle in their life.Ī relationship is all about acceptance, so you should go into it loving your partner for who they are. That said, if you've tried everything and still experience the issues listed below, it's a sure sign you're forcing your relationship to work. Couples therapy can also be a big help, since it teaches you how to approach problems in a different, and more effective, way. You may be able to make a few changes and begin seeing eye-to-eye. If it feels like there are ongoing issues, talk with your partner and share your concerns. Of course, there's nothing wrong with trying to resolve your problems, first. "However, the longer a bad relationship goes on the more pain you will experience," he says. The idea of letting go can be painful, and it's often tempting to double down and hold onto a relationship for dear life. "Instead of trying to make a square peg fit into a round hole," Seibold says, it's often better to end a relationship and move on. And when that's the case, you may ultimately decide it's no longer worth it. ![]() These are all signs you're trying too hard to make a relationship work, Jim Seibold, PhD, LMFT, a couples therapist, tells Bustle. But it should never feel as if you're fighting an uphill battle, or as if you're changing who you are in order to get along. You'll need to talk through problems, compromise, and encourage each other to grow. All relationships require effort and energy.
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